


Human

by Rainydaysunrise



Category: Carry On - Fandom, Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Carry on simon - Fandom, Fangirl - Rainbow Rowell, snow/baz
Genre: But there is a mild trigger warning in the author notes, I got a bit carried away, M/M, kinda sad, sorry - Freeform, take care of yourselves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 15:07:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16328348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainydaysunrise/pseuds/Rainydaysunrise
Summary: Baz doesn't feel...human.





	Human

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: blood and sadness and Baz breaking. Take care of yourselves and click away if you need to! I understand! 
> 
> Anyways, I'm back and I'm sorry that I've been away. Things are in my bio with a bit of an explanation. I hope you all have been good and thank you.

Simon Snow.

Simon fucking Snow would be the one to find him. Of course, that’s how fate worked after all. The one you hated and loved most would be the one to find you at your most vulnerable. That’s how that worked. Yeah.

He looked up from the glass in the basin and the blood dripping from his hands, to see those boring blue eyes staring at him.

Fuck, he was crying. And looked like a kicked puppy. 

But Baz knew he was crying for other reasons than being pitiful. 

It didn’t make him feel any better, it made him feel guilty and panicky. 

Simon shook his head and wiped at his face, crossing the distance between them so he could gently grab Baz’s wrists. 

“Sit down.”

The command was gentle but stern, enough that he obeyed and sat down on the toilet lid. 

There was a buzz in his head that would not stop.

It was there and constant and bad and annoying and- he snapped out of his thought when he felt something soft on his cheek, brushing along the frail bone.

“Baz. Take a deep breath for me.”

Baz did, and then again, and again, and again. It cleared his head a little bit. Made it easier to think.

One.

Two.

Three. 

One.

Two.

Three. 

One. Two. Three.  
He opened his eyes, when did he close them? And found Simon on his knees in front of him, wrapping his hands in a soft flannel, careful of any glass that may have found its way into his skin. 

“Baz…?” 

……………………………………..  
……………………….  
………………….  
……………..  
………….  
……….  
……  
…..  
….  
….  
..  
.

“Baz?”

.  
………..  
……………..  
……………….  
…………………….  
………………………..  
………………………….

“Basilton?”

……………………….  
…………………  
…………..  
…….  
….

“I don’t know, Penny. I think he’s in shock?” 

Baz blinked, once twice, eyebrows wrinkling at how bright the room was. 

Penelope was here, when had she got here? Baz met her eyes and watched her visibly relax. 

“Whatever it is, Simon. Our boy is back from being in his head.”

Simon reached up and stroked his boyfriends cheek. 

“I don’t want to-”

“Shut up, Baz. Tell me.”

Stern again, but tinged with worry. 

“Can you ask her to leave…? Or to wait outside? Or...something?” He couldn’t form sentences well, his brain was still figuring out how to function again.

“I’ll be outside. Call me if you need anything.” It was aimed at Simon, not him, she knew that he was being taken care of.

Baz waited until the door clicked shut and then he leaned into his boyfriend’s shoulder. 

“It got to me. Whispers. Words. Everything.”

Simon understood, or he tried. 

“So, why did you break the mirror?”

“I was angry. I can’t talk about it…”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay. And when you want to, I’ll be here.” 

Baz nodded from where his head was buried in Simon’s shoulder. 

Simon understood this. Or was trying. That was what mattered. 

He felt human. 

Even if just for a moment as Simon held him together. 

He felt so very…

(His arms wrapped around Simon’s thin back, holding him close as though he may fall apart. And together, they might just.)

Human.


End file.
